Dating DilemmaThe "Break-Up" - The end of the relationship and the start of a new life

You find yourself single - Is there life after the life you had together? 

The answer is yes by the way you are going to be fine and there are plenty more fish in the sea, ocean and deep water. It's hard to deal with the first time it ever happens to you and different people react in different ways. I guess it depends on your situation, age, love for the other person and how long you have been together. Considering all of these factors one is no better than the other it's the end of something and that is sad. 

The End ...

So we find out that we are going to be single it's a strange thought when you are used to having a person next to you that you can walk with, hold hands with and share tea and life with. One fine day they are not there to walk with, hold hands with and drink tea with.  

What are the feelings most girls / boys have when they break up 

- Feelings of loneliness it is like a part of you has been taken away so you feel empty and hollow 

- Failure you feel like you failed at something 

- Relief that the stress and arguments are over / relief of knowing where you stand and that you know you can start a fresh 

- Sadness so mourning the end of the relationship and missing the other person as a friend 

- Reminiscing all the good times together 

- What went wrong looking for reasons how you could of saved the relationship

- Thinking about meeting someone new to stop the pain and anger of the end of the current one  

- Stalking - may beg to be taken back 

- Ignore the person cut them off and never want to see them again 

Ok, so I think it's normal to feel the things above and I actually think that most people go through stages after a break-up. 

Stages to a break-up 

Stage One) Denial - They think they can somehow reverse the thing that has happened

Stage Two) Anger - Looking at how bad the other person is and how much their life is better off without them 

Stage Three) - Some change, cutting their hair, getting new clothes and even starting a new hobby 

Stage Four) Acceptance

Stage Five) - Wanting revenge or cutting the person off or wanting the relationship back 

Stage Six) - Looking for someone new (think men get someone sooner normally) or being alone hating men/woman 

Stage Seven) - Getting a rebound 

Stage Eight) - Trying new things 

Stage Nine) - Then meeting someone new and starting a new life 

What is good when you break-up 

- Keep busy have nice things to look forward to 

- Travel and do something new that enhances who you are

- Find out how to be happy alone 

- Look back at the good things you had in the relationship and hope the best for them 

- Focus on your future more than the past 

- Write down how you feel and keep a diary, it helps to let it out daily

- Surround yourself by nice friends and family 

- Don't rush into meeting someone new straight away 

- Eat fresh food and exercise to stay calm and feel good about yourself 

- Have no contact with your x as you can get over it sooner

Ok, so its easy to say these things but when you are in the situation it's much harder as you feel like the world has ended. I think that everything happens for a reason and it takes two for it to end. Never blame yourself for it both of you are responsible.  

Read books that will help you and try and understand where it went wrong if that helps you. But look forward so plan things ahead and keep busy. 

Good news is the story is about how to meet someone new and you will do soon. 

Chin up and Mr and Mrs are just around the corner and you will find them when you least expect it. 

Secret Blogger XOXO

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